This is a man who will stop at nothing to manipulate you. Unlike your Almost Nudes, The Riddler leaves you thirsty for more. Perhaps he is bike riding in Sonoma, or casually strolling down a European side street, or holding a box full of canned food he's about to donate to charity, or picnicking. He's just trying to be the best man he can be for his future family.
Mid-squat at his local crossfit; climbing a rope wall while participating in a mud run; flexing his muscles in a mirror; standing in front of a juicer, liquefying some produce he jogged to the farmer's market for. Seeking the same fit girl to live this fit lifestyle. Worldly, kind-hearted, confident, humble, perhaps he is holding a family of kittens he just rescued out of a gutter, or better yet, a block of cheese. The Perfect Man is 6'3" but he won't tell you that because he wants a girl to love him for him.
Men gravitate towards positive handles—this isn’t the place for self-deprecation—that intimate the person on the other side of the screen is sexy (stuff like “Blondie” and “Cutie”).
Meanwhile, women prefer a screen name that makes its owner sounds smart (“Made Up Of Star Stuff,” perhaps? Interestingly enough, the letters that make up your screen name may be even more important than the words they form.
And tipping the scale ever-so-slightly on the creepy side, similarity breeds affection, so a user named “Hot4YOU” would be more likely to respond to someone with the related handle “Burning4YOU”.
Sometimes Vegan, depending on where the moon is in its cycle. "Just moved here from Europe, and would love someone to explore the city with.
ALT: (This is an actual Health Freak bio I came across) "Please have REAL photos of yourself. I'll cook you dinner if you'll let me talk about my start-up app that puts shelter animals in loving homes.
Related: You were wondering when baby tigers were going to come up, weren't you? But if you, like me, will only accept perfectly carved goatees on ex-Backstreet Boys members and Riff-Raff ONLY, then left it is and let's move on. Photos of him brewing beer in small batches; carelessly strumming his acoustic guitar while admiring a distant sunrise; heavily filtered pictures of him and his attractive friends at a farm-to-table brunch; selfies resembling one of the cards in the game "Guess Who?
"; ironically making himself look much more unattractive then he actually is (who is the joke on in this case? **********NOTE: ALL THESE PHOTOS FEATURE BEARDS AND SOMETIMES UPTURNED MUSTACHES********** Some reference to pop culture to prove he is in the know and has a sense of humor: "It's going down, I'm yelling Tinderrrrr." Though this can also swing 180, pretentiously referencing records, bikes, or arthouse cinema. Swipe right, but prepare for texting with this fellow for a couple of weeks before he finally works up the courage to ask you to "hang out" with him and his friends via text. Just don't be surprised when you finally see his house and he keeps apologizing for all the toys his "niece" leaves all over the living room, or when he eventually brings up the fact that him and his ex-wife shares custody of said "niece." Age: 39. "I am dust and live in an urn" is what his bio should say.